September 25, 2024

This past Monday, during a break in my clinical schedule at the Cathedral Counseling Center, and in need of some restorative time, I walked outside the front door of the Lanier House and entered the outdoor labyrinth. I walk past it every morning when I arrive at the counseling center, and every evening as I leave for my car and the return trip to Jasper. But I don’t often take the time to walk the labyrinth, an ancient Celtic spiritual practice.

Walking the labyrinth at the Cathedral, similar to the one at Holy Family and those around the world, is a contemplative spiritual discipline. It involves prayerfully walking a marked path based on the ancient practice of pilgrimage. On a pilgrimage, a pilgrim intentionally leaves their ordinary world, journeying away from the distractions and busyness of life. Labyrinths can be used for meditation, prayer, and contemplation, or as a physical expression of a person’s spiritual journey, and are often used as a way to quiet the mind and calm anxiety. They can be used to worship and praise God, or to intercede for others. Walking the labyrinth can help persons enhance their creativity, and integrate body, mind, and spirit toward “wholeness” (or “integritas.”)

The labyrinth is one among many spiritual disciplines available to us on our journey and can be included in a Rule of Life. For many years I served as psychological health faculty for Episcopal CREDO, a wellness program for clergy designed to provide a restorative and healing experience away from the quotidian day to day life of a priest or deacon. Among the components of this week-long program is the creation of a Rule of Life, based on the Benedictine spiritual practice by the same name. 

As Richard Rohr reminds us, “one of the streams of wisdom comes from deep in the Christian tradition—the Wisdom of Benedictine Monasticism. Saint Benedict, in the fifth century, drew from an already well-established stream of transformational wisdom that came out of the deserts of Egypt and Syria via a first generation of people who wanted to practice what it means to put on the mind of Christ. Saint Benedict became heir to this and shaped it into a massive, stable container, which has been the foundation of Christian monasticism and monastic transformational practice in the West for 1,500 years. Its brilliant and stable legacy of “Ora et Labora”: “Prayer and Work,” offers a fundamental rhythm for the balancing and ordering of human life.

Joan Chittister, a vowed religious sister of the Order of Saint Benedict, explains how the Rule of Benedict provides an opportunity for transformation for everyone who chooses to follow its wisdom:

All in all, the Rule of Benedict is designed for ordinary people who live ordinary lives. It was not written for priests or mystics or hermits or ascetics; it was written by a layman for laymen. It was written to provide a model of spiritual development for the average person who intends to live life beyond the superficial or the uncaring. [1] ..

Benedict was quite precise about it all. Time was to be spent in prayer, in sacred reading, in work, and in community participation. In other words, it was to be spent on listening to the Word, on study, on making life better for others, and on community building. It was public as well as private; it was private as well as public. It was balanced. No one thing consumed the monastic’s life. No one thing got exaggerated out of all proportion to the other dimensions of life. No one thing absorbed the human spirit to the exclusion of every other. Life was made up of many facets and only together did they form a whole. Physical labor and mental prayer and social life and study and community concerns were all pieces of the puzzle of life. Life flowed through time, with time as its guardian. [2] At the end of every CREDO week, the participants shared their Rule of Life based on their reflections during the conference and for me, this was among the most moving and important aspects of the CREDO experience. 

Last week at our pastoral care committee meeting, we wondered together about possible opportunities for the ongoing development and growth of this vital area of our parish community, one with a rich history of caring for souls in a variety of ways. Among the possibilities before us is a program already established across the denomination, including in our own Diocese, the Community of Hope, a lay pastoral care based on Benedictine Spiritual traditions. This is increasingly important in a season of the Episcopal Church with increasing emphasis on “Lay led, clergy supported” parishes.

Here is more information about the Community of Hope, and the first weekend in October is the COHI conference at Kanuga. I’ll be gathering more information about how we might connect with this group as we move forward! Our Stewardship campaign indeed encourages each of us to share our many, many gifts and graces in a variety of ways. Perhaps this is one of yours! https://www.cohi.org/2024-annual-conference

I’ll catch you later on down the trail, and I hope to see you in church!

Bill+

References:

[1] Joan D. Chittister, Wisdom Distilled from the Daily: Living the Rule of St. Benedict Today (HarperSanFrancisco: 1991), 4. [2] Chittister, 74­–75. Adapted from Cynthia Bourgeault, An Introductory Wisdom School: Course Transcript and Companion Guide (Wisdom Way of Knowing: 2017), 4. Learn about and register for Cynthia’s online Introductory Wisdom School.

September 18, 2024

River Sojourns-Life JourneysBill Harkins

One of the enduring joys of my youth has been a fondness for rivers, lakes, and streams. Growing up, I especially enjoyed whitewater canoeing and kayaking, and the wild places to which these activities took me. In our beautiful Southern Appalachians, with an abundance of water resources, I felt at home on the Amicalola and the Chestatee, the Chattahoochee, and the Nantahala. In more recent years, I discovered sea kayaking, and I’ve been fortunate to paddle in places as diverse and magical as coastal Maine, Southeast Alaska, and the Boundary Waters of Minnesota. It is a delight to view the world from the perspective of the water. 

One notices the intricacy and beauty of creation in new and remarkable ways. One is for a time both in—and of—the context of the water. The Japanese poet Basho knew this experience well:

The old pond, ah!

A frog jumps in:

The water’s sound!

Like the ripples of my paddle as I navigate the current of the Cartecay, the frog’s presence both disrupts the smooth texture of the world and belongs to it. Yet, in some ways we are different, Basho’s frog and I. We humans cannot fully immerse ourselves in the river world around us. We cannot escape our estrangement in the world, as the theologians Kierkegaard, Tillich, and others have expressed so well. We are wholly in the world, but reflectively so. We are carried along by the current, even as we co-participate in our passage and watch our ripples spread for better or worse. We are at one and the same time travelers, and part of the terrain. We are sojourners in our own home. And as such, we need companions on our journeys. We ask questions about who, and whose we are, where our lives are going, and the meaning of our sojourn here. This is one reason we have created churches: as contexts which bind us together (“religio”) in our quest for meaning. These questions are best asked in community, and we do this so well together at Holy Family!

One of my favorite poets is Gerard Manly Hopkins, an Anglican whose writings were often prompted and inspired by nature. In one of my favorite of his poems he wrote, “The world is charged with the grandeur of God, it goes out like shining from shook foil….” God’s grandeur is particularly evident this time of year. The slant of light and the gentle beginning of cool, crisp days, along with the turning leaves, all conspire to create my favorite season. Many of us seek out more time in nature during autumn. This is in keeping with our sacramental view of God’s creation, sojourners as we are, and of the natural world as outward and visible signs of this expression of God’s love.

During these weeks of shortening days, intense light, and cooler nights, we turn inward. The Celts knew this, and held autumnal equinox bonfires to mark the changing seasons. Liturgically, we do this as well, moving as we do from Pentecost to Advent. And God speaks to us, through the grandeur of nature and in other ways. Listen to what this season, and God in it, might be saying to you. We discover this best through active prayer. Perhaps there are points at which our joy in God’s grandeur brings God joy as well! This week we observed the Feast Day of Hildegard of Bingen, whose work is among those being read and discussed by our own Wisdom of the Women Mystics class:

“The Word is living, being, spirit, all verdant greening, all

creativity. This Word manifests itself in every creature…Like

billowing clouds,

Like the incessant gurgle of the brook,

The longing of the spirit can never be stilled.” ~ Hildegard of Bingen

As some of you know, in addition to teaching for many years, I have continued to see patients at the Cathedral Counseling Center. Those of us who work there do so out of our conviction that it is ultimately relationships that heal what is broken. And relationships provide the best context for asking the deepest spiritual questions about our lives. Theologian Ed Farley, one of my graduate school professors, once described courage as “venturing forth into creation with vitality and wonder.” This is true of both river sojourns, and the many journeys we take over the course of our lives. We often need companions on our journeys. One of my favorite authors, the psychiatrist Donald Winnicott, began his autobiography with these lines: “O God, this is my prayer. My prayer is that I will be fully alive when I die.” Indeed, God fully glorified is a human being fully alive in this sense. Holy Family is a place where we can cultivate relationships, and explore our own opportunities for service in this particular, singularly unique corner of God’s creation. These are opportunities to be more fully alive, in community.

Our wonderful Stewardship theme this year beautifully ties together the past, present, and future: “Rooted in Faith; Growing in Grace; Preparing for Tomorrow.” It’s a lovely invitation to all members of this Beloved Community to reflect on our role in the ongoing story of Holy Family, and how each of us can contribute to its future. In this beautiful season here at our beloved Holy Family, please give some thought to how you might contribute in any way the Holy Spirit may be calling you. Over the next few weeks we will share stories about the various ministries at Holy Family, just as we heard in a heartfelt message from Leamarie this past week. At heart, these are invitations to find deeper ways to get involved, in community, in this sacred place, and to find meaning in the process. And should you need a paddling companion for a time on your journey, please let us know, and grab a paddle—the water’s fine! I hope to see you in church, and I’ll catch you later on down the river!

Bill +

September 22, 2024

18th Sunday after Pentecost – Bill Harkins

Proper 20, Year B

The Collect of the Day

Grant us, Lord, not to be anxious about earthly things, but to love things heavenly; and even now, while we are placed among things that are passing away, to hold fast to those that shall endure; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, forever and ever. Amen.

The Gospel: Mark 9:30-37 Jesus and his disciples passed through Galilee. He did not want anyone to know it; for he was teaching his disciples, saying to them, “The Son of Man is to be betrayed into human hands, and they will kill him, and three days after being killed, he will rise again.” But they did not understand what he was saying and were afraid to ask him. Then they came to Capernaum; and when he was in the house he asked them, “What were you arguing about on the way?” But they were silent, for on the way they had argued with one another who was the greatest. He sat down, called the twelve, and said to them, “Whoever wants to be first must be last of all and servant of all.” Then he took a little child and put it among them; and taking it in his arms, he said to them, “Whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me, and whoever welcomes me welcomes not me but the one who sent me.”

In the Name of the God of Creation, who loves us all…Amen.

Good morning, and welcome to Holy Family on this 18th Sunday after Pentecost. We are so very glad you are here, and if you are visiting with us today a heartfelt and warm Holy Family welcome to you! Today, we hear more predictions from Jesus—the second week in a row—and the Disciples’ responses based on fear. Then, Mark 9:31 reminds us that they disciples remain confused and in denial about the paradigm shifts to which he lovingly, transparently tried to alert them; “He was teaching his disciples, telling them again that he will be delivered into human hands and killed. Again they were afraid to ask him more about this, because they were afraid, and we know by now that fear is a common theme in Mark. And so their arguing among themselves about “Who is greatest” gets two responses from Jesus. The first is that “whoever wants to be first must be least of all and the servant of all.” Servant leadership is pathway to ‘greatness,’ but a greatness they could not fully understand based on their contextual understanding of power, and kingdom, both viewed from the perspective of the Roman Empire. The Kingdom of God as Jesus represented it, turns this understanding of Empire upside down. Instead of striving for the top and being in a position of power, one must seek first to serve. Or, as the rock group The Police said so well, “when you find your servant, there’s your master.”

The second answer is that whoever welcomes one of these children in Jesus’ name welcomes him. It is surprising and somewhat ironic, isn’t it, that in a power struggle in the midst of which the disciples are behaving like children, Jesus unmasks their aspiration to power by putting a real child in among them as a lesson. This is not a romantic, idealized version of children, who, as any parent or grandparent or teacher or childcare worker can tell you can be a handful sometimes! Rather, the child in this story is a representation of “the least of these.” The Kingdom of God assesses and assigns value differently than the human realm. God will receive those who receive the child. This will give access to true power, the power of the one who sent Jesus.” The disciples don’t get it…This is a common theme in Mark, repeated now twice. But out of compassion, it is a failure to understand that does not bring about rebuke from Jesus, at least not here, but deeper teaching in rabbinical role. Jesus does not abandon the Twelve in their ignorance. Eventually it all makes sense, but not until after the resurrection. And just one chapter later, the disciples try to shoo children away. Because it was and continues to be so countercultural – Jesus’ ministry is hard to understand. The Disciples’ continually fear what is going to happen, and in the midst of their fear, they are arguing about who would be greatest. Perhaps they believed that if they achieved “greatness,” then they would also have security. Jesus points to another way of seeking certainty amid ambiguity and change.

In her fine book, Daring Greatly, social researcher Brené Brown tells a story about an experience she had in graduate school that surprised her. Called to a meeting with a professor, she expected to be intimidated and rebuked. Instead, her teacher was an ally. The professor pulled up a chair, sat down beside her, and offered Brené Brown adjustments in a thoughtful and compassionate way. This is shaky ground for a lot of us: moments when our work, our ideas, our deeply held convictions, and our actions are open to feedback. We are in the midst of such a season here at Holy Family. Every semester, for some 30 years as a professor, I was evaluated by my students, and it is a process I both welcomed and found anxiety producing. What if my methodology and pedagogy are found lacking? What if my clinical convictions have proven inaccurate and my doctoral students find this misleading in their clinical work? What if my theological positions have not stood the test of time—and of the classroom, and heaven forbid, what if I am unable or unwilling to change and grow?

This is a place of immense vulnerability. But it’s also the place where we are the most open and receptive. And, it is where we may find growth, and resilience, and a flourishing, growing personhood. If we’re nurtured well, this is how ideas evolve, broken systems detach, and innovation emerges. As one who spent most of my career with seminary and doctoral students, and now with patients, and here among you all, I can say that my most meaningful moments are—well—those “teachable moments” when I saw the light of imagination coming into the eyes of my students, and clients, and those whom I serve for a brief time here…and perhaps, in my own eyes as well. So, let me tell you what I see…

This past week as I attended meetings of our pastoral care, finance, and hospitality committees, and last week a gathering of our vestry and nominating committee, and before that, of a vestry retreat, I was so proud of this parish. On Wednesday evening, at our wonderful Wednesday gathering, I paused by the lakeside and shared with Howell and several nearby the lovely autumnal light, illuminating the far shore, the slowly changing leaves, their reflections in the clear water giving us a bountiful double dose of color… the light of hope and imagination that I see in each of you, working so hard in this time of transition, and the enabling of the priesthood of all believers in this beloved parish, are for me the light of Christ in the world and my reason for doing what I do. The focus is not on the professor, or the priest, but on the light she or he helps illumine along the way. Jesus, in his rabbinical role with the disciples, never sought to be the center of attention. He gave himself away on love. So often our flourishing is a result of someone making a choice to sit beside or even to gently challenge us. That person carries a huge responsibility, and it is a sacred one.

Nearly every day, my friends, we are capable of being that person, with that responsibility. Whether we are offering feedback to a colleague, telling a child it’s bedtime, offering our own vulnerability to another, teaching or mentoring, or gently extending a contrary opinion when two perspectives are in conflict. Grace in disagreement — saying this could be different, and how — is an essential part of the human experience. We evolve through disagreement. Ideas subjected to criticism grow stronger than ideas left unchallenged. It’s not disagreement, but graceful disagreement that makes the world go round. And it is rediscovering that grace that Brené Brown articulates so well in her guidelines for engaged feedback, and that Jesus is suggesting in today’s Gospel. Brown believes that we know we are ready to give feedback when we are ready to sit next to another rather than across from them; when we are willing to put the problem in front of us rather than between us; when we are ready to listen, to ask questions, and accept that we may not fully understand the issue; when we acknowledge what another does well, instead of picking apart mistakes; when we recognize another’s strengths and how they can use them to address challenges; when we can hold another accountable without shaming or blaming; when we are willing to own our part and can genuinely thank another for their efforts rather than criticize them for their failings; when we can model the vulnerability and openness that we expect to see from others. When we do not waste our energy arguing about who it is among us that is the greatest…. Of course a great many teachers already do this, especially teachers of young children. Funny, isn’t it, how Jesus uses the image of a childlike sense of wonder, and of welcoming the child, as a guide to gracious hospitality. The art of guiding and adjusting with compassion is common practice in classrooms around the world. When we grow older, we sometimes forget that offering and hearing feedback can be a place of mutuality and growth. Disharmony and discomfort can be grounds for transformation once grace and compassion are in the mix. What we need now more than ever is the capacity to both hear and speak honestly together. We need to seek not the hollow shells of half-ideas but the fullness of two thoughts, even when — especially if — they are in conflict. It is these antitheses, as Hegel wrote, that produce the most vibrant synthesis. It has been, in many ways, a difficult summer, marked by violence, and racial and religious tension, and deepening cultural and religious polarities the likes of which have not been seen in many years. I sometimes wonder if the art of graceful disagreement has disappeared altogether from the public square. The older I get, the more I value the kind of childlike sense of wonder—a curiosity as opposed to judgment—that Jesus talks about in today’s Gospel text. The Gospel calls us to a place of hospitality, and joy, because joy and compassion amidst hospitality are at the heart of table fellowship. Table fellowship reveals the boundaries of human relationships. Even during times of sadness and anger, we are commanded by God to discover the path of forgiveness for those who perpetrate evil against us. And we are called to recognize our own shadow side, which may blind us to the ways we do not and perhaps cannot listen to our sisters and brothers. We are called to transcend the urge to argue about who is the greatest. We are called to remember that it is often more important to be in right relationship, than to be right. We may even need to be willing to embrace our own failures, our own limited vision, and to let go of old agendas and embrace with wonder the new. Wendell Berry, our American treasure of a poet, essayist, and novelist, said this:  

I go by a field where once

I cultivated a few poor crops.

It is now covered with young trees,

for the forest that belongs here

has come back and reclaimed its own.

And I think of all the effort

I have wasted and all the time,

and of how much joy I took

in that failed work and how much

it taught me. For in so failing

I learned something of my place,

something of myself, and now

I welcome back the trees.

Our Baptismal Covenant, dear one’s, calls us to hold onto the vision of a God who is present with us, even in our uncertainty, incredulity, vulnerability, and at times, our anguish at the world around us. This is a God full of mercy and grace, present with those who are lost, abounding in steadfast love, even in the face of uncertainty. Rumi, the Sufi mystic and poet, once said, “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and right-doing there is a field. I’ll meet you there.” That field, as in the childlike table fellowship to which Jesus invites us, awaits us all when we say “yes” to compassion, and grace—and perhaps especially, grace-full disagreement. And Sometimes we let our fears keep us from trying new things…even if we hear the whispers of the Holy Spirit giving us courage. Now more than ever Holy Family needs risk takers, curiosity seekers, lovers of souls who are among those willing to find the pearl of great price…their own place in the field of dreams that is this beloved parish. Let’s be in this together, shall we?

September 15, 2024

17th Sunday after PentecostBill Harkins

Proper 19, Year B

The Collect of the Day

O God, because without you we are not able to please you, mercifully grant that your Holy Spirit may in all things direct and rule our hearts; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever.Amen.

The Gospel: Mark 8:27-38 Jesus went on with his disciples to the villages of Caesarea Philippi; and on the way he asked his disciples, “Who do people say that I am?” And they answered him, “John the Baptist; and others, Elijah; and still others, one of the prophets.” He asked them, “But who do you say that I am?” Peter answered him, “You are the Messiah.” And he sternly ordered them not to tell anyone about him…Then he began to teach them that the Son of Man must undergo great suffering, and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests, and the scribes, and be killed, and after three days rise again. He said all this quite openly. And Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. But turning and looking at his disciples, he rebuked Peter and said, “Get behind me, Satan! For you are setting your mind not on divine things, but on human things.” He called the crowd with his disciples, and said to them, “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake, and for the sake of the gospel, will save it. For what will it profit them to gain the whole world and forfeit their life? Indeed, what can they give in return for their life? Those who are ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, of them the Son of Man will also be ashamed when he comes in the glory of his Father with the holy angels.”

In the Name of the God of Creation, who loves us all….Amen. Good morning, and welcome to Holy Family on this 17th Sunday after Pentecost. We are glad you are here, and if you are visiting this morning please do let us know so we can get to know you. Today we hear a challenging Gospel text from Mark who reminds us, through Peter, of the ups and downs and vicissitudes of discipleship, and the courage that is required of us all, especially when we are not sure where we are, or where we are going. On this long sojourn into Pentecost, we’ve heard about the emerging ministry of Jesus; the miracles, the healing, the feeding of thousands, the calling of the disciples. Mid-way on the journey is Peter’s remarkable declaration, “You are the Messiah,” the first time anyone has stated exactly who Jesus is. It is a journey of trust, and contains all of the challenges of being steadfast amidst uncertainty. As we heard today, this declaration results in some unexpected consequences, especially for Peter. I find myself identifying with him, however, and this may say more about me than Peter, but I certainly have no trouble thinking of times when I took a journey that ended up quite differently than I had intended. The mantra of my trail running group is “Conditions may vary.” Perhaps you, too, have found yourself lost at times, uncertain which way to go. I can only imagine what the disciples must have felt before Peter’s declaration, “You are the Christ.” There must have been a good deal of uncertainty and speculation about exactly who this man Jesus might be, and of course, following Jesus often took the disciples into new territory. Perhaps there were times when they thought, “This is not exactly what I signed up for on this trip,” and, “What was I thinking?” When Jesus told them that he was to be rejected, abused, and even murdered, Peter, perhaps fearing for his own life, rebuked Jesus. He could not imagine such a thing happening to his Messiah. Maybe Peter envisioned the great and powerful things that Jesus would do when his “Messiah-ship” came to its fruition. Perhaps he even imagined himself standing beside Jesus as a trusted assistant, sharing the glory of the throne. Surely suffering was not a part of Peter’s dream for Jesus, or for himself or the others. And that humanity is, I suspect, one of the reasons we are drawn to Peter throughout the Gospel accounts. We can easily see ourselves acting likewise. We know that taking up one’s cross is no easy task. Some of them went into hiding. Peter denied Jesus… his head denying what his heart knew was true. They were all weary, and afraid, and uncertain. And come to that, none of us can know what lies before us, or what will be asked of us in the days or years ahead. But we can reflect on the nature of our discipleship. We can make choices on our journey by trusting not so much our sense of “reason,” but rather Jesus, who calls us to be in discipleship and promises we will not be alone. 

Incidentally, those English scholars among us will recognize that in the passage from Mark Jesus says, “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” The “deny yourself” in this passage has no direct object. We often believe we need to deny ourselves “something.” Yet, I wonder if this is necessary. This passage does not refer to a denial of anything. Paradoxically, this denial of one thing or another actually has the opposite effect of causing us to focus on too much on ourselves. Perhaps the best way to deny ourselves is by getting ourselves off our hands, doing the work we have to do, so that when we are called to do God’s work, our issues do not get in the way. Maybe this is what Jesus means when he says we must “lose ourselves in order to find ourselves.”

I want to tell you a story about the small mountain parish I served many years ago, as a Postulant. The rector, my boss at the time, gave me an assignment to create a new lay ministry for the parish. Since I was at the time a professor of pastoral care, I developed and taught a course on “Lay Pastoral Care,” designed to equip lay persons with theory and skills in pastoral care, and to empower them to use these skills in the community—both in the church, and beyond. We began carefully with the theological summons of our Baptismal Covenant. In that Covenant we promise “…to seek and serve Christ in all persons, loving your neighbor as yourself…to strive for justice and peace among all people, and to respect the dignity of every human being.”[1]

Over the course of the next few months the enthusiasm for the class was palpable and inspiring. Together we began to imagine the possibilities for the harvest that might follow our seasons of learning about grief counseling, visitation in hospitals, continuous care facilities and care for the chronically ill, as well as elder care, a “casserole patrol” as a form of crisis ministry, Lay Eucharistic visitation, and other forms of pastoral care. By summer, we proposed to the Vestry the parameters of a new ministry of Lay Pastoral Care. This was subsequently approved. New life in community suddenly existed where none had previously been in the service of “bearing one another’s burdens,” to use Paul’s language. We were delighted.

Soon, however, problems began to emerge. Some became worried about best practices and methodology, others about who among them had the best and most appropriate gifts and graces for particular forms of ministry, and why. This was typically born of fears of inadequacy, not unusual when we are learning new skills of course. Opinions about overlapping forms of care and responsibility threatened to overshadow the reasons the ministry was created in the first place. Even the clergy staff began to disagree about what the laity should, and should not be “allowed” to do. In some instances these debates took on a personal tone, and feelings were hurt. Persons were becoming preoccupied with the letter of the “law” rather than the spirit of compassionate life in community we sought to embody. Our communal efforts at bearing one another’s burdens were becoming a burden to us all.

In his interaction with Peter, Jesus is reminding us that one thing is needed—the focus on the “so what” of our sojourns as Christian. And we recall that in the midst of the crisis of the young church seeking to become established, Paul encourages the giving of oneself in faithful service, gratitude, and humility rather than arrogance, hubris, and emphasis on differences based on one’s particular spiritual gifts and graces. For Paul, life in community should be governed by faithful stewardship of all resources, a stewardship marked by “sowing to the spirit.” 

Well, a while after the formation of the Lay Pastoral Care Ministry, one of the “founding” members was unexpectedly stricken ill. En route to London on a plane high over the Atlantic, this parishioner had a life-threatening heart attack, was resuscitated, and kept alive by CPR until the plane returned to New York. She was stabilized in hospital there and eventually returned to a lengthy convalescence at home in the mountains. Somehow, this crisis in the community provided the occasion for all the hopes and expectations originally envisioned for the Lay Pastoral Care ministry to emerge and coalesce around her care. The various committees sprang into action without rancor or emphasis on whom should do what, or why. The gifts and abilities inherent in the committee seemed to sort themselves out, emerge, and come to life. Tasks were delegated, carried out, and engaged with enthusiasm and faithfulness. A spirit of grace prevailed. Lay ministers devotedly brought her the Eucharist, and all of their ministry skills blossomed.

Our experience with the Lay Pastoral Care ministry—a ministry thriving in that parish to this day—called us back to our Baptismal Covenant. We were reminded that compassion is a practical pastoral virtue that transcends law, and invokes grace in action, joy in the spirit. It respects the dignity of all human beings. Yes, and compassion, born of grace, is the virtue that sustains, no matter what our reception in the towns and villages to which we may be sent. One of my favorite quotes is that Transformation happens at the cellular level.” This is true when we exercise, and when we engage in small acts of compassion—the small, daily acts and expressions of transformation that have the power to change the world, and ourselves in it. As Richard Rohr says, “Sooner or later, if you are on any classic “spiritual schedule,” some event, person, death, idea, or relationship will enter your life with which you simply cannot cope using your present skill set, acquired knowledge, or willpower. Spiritually speaking, you will be led to the edge of your own private resources.” This is in part what Peter faced in today’s Gospel…he was bumping up against his own limitations. And like Peter, one must “lose” at something, and then begin to develop the art of losing.This is the only way that Life/Fate/God/Grace/Mystery can get us to change, let go of our egocentric preoccupations—deny ourselves, to use today’s Gospel language—and go on the further and larger journey. We must stumble and fall. Because, until we are led to the limits of our present game plan and find it to be insufficient, we will not search out or find our real Source. Alcoholics Anonymous calls it the Higher Power. Jesus calls this Ultimate Source the “living water” at the bottom of the well (see John 4:10-14). Oh, and that mountain parish I served so many years ago was our own beloved Holy Family. And already, in this season of transition, new ministries are being born and new forms of stewardship—those gifts of time, talent, and giving in so many ways so important to the life of this parish—are being created. So please give prayerful consideration to how you might contribute. In the next few weeks we will be sharing stories of grace, and hospitality, and opportunities for serving. This is not so much an old school stewardship narrative as it is an imaginative, generative invitation to give of ourselves—and in so doing—being transformed. So many good things are happening here my friends, and perhaps you have gifts for music, or leadership, or hospitality…or even pastoral care, that even you may not have been aware you had! Listen to the words of the poet David Whyte, a poem about thoughtful, incarnational stewardship, about denying oneself, and finding oneself becoming fully alive:

Our great mistake is to act the drama

as if we were alone. As if life

were a progressive and cunning crime

with no witness to the tiny hidden

transgressions. To feel abandoned is to deny

the intimacy of your surroundings. Surely,

even you, at times, have felt the grand array;

the swelling presence, and the chorus, crowding

out your solo voice. You must note

the way the soap dish enables you,

or the window latch grants you freedom.

Alertness is the hidden discipline of familiarity.

The stairs are your mentor of things

to come, the doors have always been there

to frighten you and invite you,

and the tiny speaker in the phone

is your dream-ladder to divinity.

Put down the weight of your aloneness and ease into the

conversation. The kettle is singing

even as it pours you a drink, the cooking pots

have left their arrogant aloofness and

seen the good in you at last. All the birds

and creatures of the world are unutterably

themselves. Everything is waiting for you.

Amen. [1] The Book of Common Prayer, The Episcopal Church, (1979) Church Publishing Incorporated, New York, New York, pp. 304-305. 

September 11, 2024

We paused on the trail—tired, hot, and momentarily liberated from the weight of our heavy packs—and I sat down on a scorched, fallen log, grateful for the respite, in what only three years earlier had been a verdant, old growth Montana forest. Now, the charred remains of spruce, lodge-pole pine, and fir were all that I could see. Burned sentinels of formerly majestic trees rose ahead and above us, and those no longer standing seemed to litter the forest floor as if some great force had arbitrarily tossed them and let them lay where they fell. Chaos and destruction seemed all around. I found myself feeling sad, and lamenting the loss of what I knew had once been a fecund, flourishing forest ecosystem.

I was in the Scapegoat Wilderness area of Montana with dear friends from graduate school, an annual, much-anticipated sojourn, and this was not what I had in mind when I flew into Great Falls a few days before. I’d had visions of escaping my native southern heat by hiking in cool, pristine sub-alpine forests, and I now found myself in a forest radically changed by fire; ravaged, and permanently damaged. Or was it? Was I seeing the whole picture?

Several days prior to our Montana hike, we converged on Great Falls, Montana, where Scott, the younger brother of one of our cohort, lives and owns a small cabin in the Bob Marshall Wilderness area, about 40 miles east of Augusta, Montana. We planned to spend 5-6 days backpacking in what is affectionately called “the Bob,” some of the most magnificent wilderness in the country. When the plane landed in Great Falls I became immediately aware of dense smoke in the air, caused by wildfires in the wilderness area 80 miles away, where we were headed. Once assembled, we loaded up the truck and drove west toward the “Ahorn” fire (fires out west are typically named for a local, distinctive feature). Smoke filled the horizon, and I wondered what lay ahead. Would the USFS fight the fire, or would they let it burn? Fire management is a complex issue, as I learned during my Montana stay. The Native Americans understood that fire, though dangerous and potentially destructive, could also be life-giving. They often intentionally set fires for agricultural and hunting purposes. Following suit, the USFS understands that fire is nature’s way of restoring and replenishing the forest. Indeed, they often let fires burn themselves out, unless they threaten homes, businesses, or other human-related areas.[i] After a day at the cabin, monitoring the fire—now grown from 8,000 to 15,000 acres, we consulted the USFS and changed our backcountry route to a more southerly course, out of the Lewis and Clark Wilderness and into the Scapegoat Wilderness area.

Our hiking trip, thus re-routed to the south began at a trailhead in an area burned by a large and ferocious fire several years earlier. The hot sun, unimpeded by green branches, shone full force on our single-file procession of backpackers and served as a compelling and present reminder of the effects of the fire. It was by most outward appearances a scene of utter desolation, and a mordant reminder of the damage being wrought by the Ahorn fire to the north. It was hard to reconcile the forest, wildflowers, lovely meadows, and waterfalls we left behind in a smoky haze with the pyrrhic terrain through which we now walked. And, although I knew that the sub-alpine lake where we planned to camp for the night was not in the burn area, I consoled myself with images of a clear mountain lake, cool breezes, and a deep forest of many, many shades of green, this was a dramatically different world. Truth told it seemed to reflect aspects of my own inner state. Only a few months after the death of my mother, and the leaving for college of our younger son, I realized that I, too, was adjusting to significant changes in the emotional ecology of my own life. In some ways, the landscape around me—an ecological system in the midst of radical change—seemed to mirror some of the changes in my world as well. I too, was in uncertain, suspect terrain. After several miles of hiking on this hot day, we stopped for water and rest still solidly ensconced in the burn. As we sat, quietly, I began to look around. Amidst the desolation, I began to see that life was everywhere, pushing upward in infinite detail, where my vision had been limited only to what was most obvious to the eye. I caught a glimpse of a mule deer, drawn to the open terrain by the lush, waist-high vegetation now growing in the sunlight. Light, life-giving and fierce, seemed to have given birth to the life lying in the trees, and in the soil, all along. Fireweed, a lovely plant, with lavender and pink flowers, that grows in just such burned-over land, was everywhere round us. How had I missed it?

As I listened, and watched, and finally began to pay attention, I heard a low, buzzing hum, and then began to see that the fireweed had attracted hundreds of hummingbirds, dodging and darting, feeding on the fireweed nectar, along with bees and other insects. Birds, marmots, chipmunks, wildlife of all kinds seemed suddenly visible, where before I had seen only blackened trees and desolation. Life seemed to be flourishing where once there I had seen only death, and destruction. And I had not seen it, in part because I had not paid attention to the moment—and to the larger, more complex picture it contained. Focusing only on the blackened trees straight ahead and above me, and on my fear of the fires to the north, fears stirred by the landscape all around me, I failed to see the profusion of life flourishing right beneath my feet. Seeds of lodgepole pines, needing only the intense heat of the fire to release their inner Chi—the deepest, essential life breath and energy, and I had both literally and metaphorically not seen the emerging new forest for the desolate, burned trees. To contend with high-impact fire, lodge-pole pine produce cones that open following exposure to extreme heat (termed ‘serotiny’). This serotinous strategy is one piece of evidence that fire was historically a prevalent disturbance across the lodgepole pine ecosystems of the Rocky Mountains. And, though trees are the big players in forests, understory species (like grasses, shrubs, and fungal networks) also have a strong evolutionary relationship with fire. Following fire, areas dominated by sprouting species (aspen, cottonwood, gambel oak, many grasses, and many shrubs) tend to rapidly return to pre-fire conditions. These species, many of which were previously rare or absent, flourish under the new conditions. Indeed, flourishing was everywhere, in stark contrast to the all too evident reminders of what had been, on the surface, a very challenging time for this forest ecosystem. The forest was exhibiting profound resilience amidst what appeared on the surface profound destruction. One needed only to quiet oneself, sit, and pay attention to see it.

On Wednesday of last week, 15 souls gathered in our Holy Family chapel for the “First Wednesday Healing Service.” I shared a brief version of this story with those gathered, reminding us all that “wholeness” and healing may not always take the forms with which we are most familiar. The emphasis in these services is “care” as opposed to “cure.” By gathering together—the very act of showing up—we are co-participants in healing, solace, nurture, and compassion. Even as our church, like so many churches, is in a season of transition, we are flourishing in so many ways. At the heart of this flourishing is imagination, creativity, and our intentional cultivation of relationships, and hospitality. After the service we gathered for lunch, and the laughter and conversation around the table were also healing for us all. In an age of loneliness, providing opportunities for connection can heal us all, including mind, body, and spirit[1]

Recently I gathered in Northern Colorado with friends from graduate school, a trip almost canceled due to fires in the area. A week of heavy rains extinguished the fires and we were able to proceed with this annual trip. The valley where we stay is at 9’000’ at the confluence of Rocky Mountain National Park and the Comanche Wilderness, and was the site of significant fires in 1994 and 2022. On a trail run through the former burn area, I delighted in the young Aspen, spruce, and pines are flourishing in outward and visible signs of resilience, a coming back to life in myriad ways

The Paschal Mystery at the heart of an Incarnational, sacramental spirituality, is about the ongoing reception of the Holy Spirit in the ever-flourishing receiving of it here, now, in the moment at hand, a process of transition—and transformation. There, we are given both new life and new spirit. Ron Rolheiser suggests that ”It begins with suffering and death, moves on to the reception of new life, spends time grieving the old and adjusting to the new, and finally, only after the old life has been truly let go of, is new spirit given, for the life we are already given.”[i]  We might even glimpse the Baptismal promise of resurrection during times of transition—times, that is, of waiting, watching, listening. Understood in this way, emotional and relational wisdom can emerge from such transitions—those conflicted, contested, potentially life-giving spaces. This can transform us, and potentially those whom we find there, even as it transforms the boundaries themselves, in an ever-fluid, reciprocal, and hopefully generative unfolding. This is how change becomes transition, through resilience, as we adapt to the inevitable changes in our lives. I am so grateful for all those at Holy Family who, in this season of transition, are proving resilient and helping others to find life-giving resilience as well. We shall indeed find new life at Holy Family as we seek a way forward. Last Wednesday, those gathered for the Healing Service were themselves outward and visible signs of resilience, and hope amidst transition. And so it is for all those who serve this parish in so many ways, including simply showing up, paying attention, and bearing witness to signs of new life! Thank you!

I’ll catch you later on down the trail, and I hope to see you in church!

Blessings, Bill

[1] https://www.cdc.gov/social-connectedness/risk-factors/index.html [i] Ronald Rolheiser, The Holy Longing: The Search for a Christian Spirituality, (New York: Doubleday, 1999), p. 147. 

September 4, 2024

This month we observe the Feast Days of two remarkable women, Hildegard and Phoebe. Hildegard of Bingen, born in 1098 in the lush Rhineland Valley, was a mystic, poet, composer, dramatist, doctor, and scientist. Her parents’ tenth child, she was tithed to the Church and raised by the anchoress Jutta in a cottage near the Benedictine monastery of Disibodenberg. Drawn by the life of silence and prayer, other women joined them, finding the freedom, rare outside women’s religious communities, to develop their intellectual gifts. They organized as a convent under the authority of the abbot of Disibodenberg, with Jutta as abbess. When Jutta died, Hildegard, then 38, became abbess. Later she founded independent convents at Bingen (1150) and Eibingen (1165), with the Archbishop of Mainz as her only superior. From childhood, Hildegard experienced dazzling spiritual visions.

We are told that at age 43, a voice commanded her to tell what she saw. So began an outpouring of extraordinarily original writings illustrated by unusual and wondrous illuminations. These works abound with feminine imagery for God and God’s creative activity. In 1147, Bernard of Clairvaux recommended her first book of visions, Scivias, to Pope Eugenius III, leading to papal authentication at the Synod of Trier. Hildegard became famous, eagerly sought for counsel, a correspondent of kings and queens, abbots and abbesses, archbishops and popes. She carried out four preaching missions in northern Europe, unprecedented activity for a woman. She practiced medicine, focusing on women’s needs; published treatises on natural science and philosophy; wrote a liturgical drama, The Play of the Virtues, in which personified virtues sing their parts and the devil, condemned to live without music, can only speak.*

For Hildegard, music was essential to worship. Her liturgical compositions, unusual in structure and tonality, were described by contemporaries as “chant of surpassing sweet melody” and “strange and unheard-of music.” Hildegard lived in a world accustomed to male governance. Yet, within her convents, and to a surprising extent outside them, she exercised a commanding spiritual authority based on confidence in her visions and considerable political astuteness. When she died in 1179 at 81, she left a rich legacy which speaks eloquently across the ages. 

St. Phoebe is recognized as the first woman deacon, although we know little about her life. She is honored as being the prototype for female deacons just as St. Stephen is the prototype for male deacons. In her book Women Deacons in the Orthodox Church Dr. Kyriaki FitzGerald suggests that St. Phoebe is an example of faith and service for female deacons. St. Phoebe came from a very busy port area called Cenchreae, a popular stop for people traveling from Syria or Asia Minor. Although there has been a great amount of debate concerning what her actual duties as a deacon might have been, it is clear that St. Paul gave recognition to St. Phoebe, thanking her in public for her hospitality and for meeting the needs of the people in Cenchreae, and urging others to help her with her ministry as “a deaconess of the Church at Cenchreae.”*

Centuries later, St. John Chrysostom praised St. Phoebe’s work for the Church as an inspiration and model for both men and women to imitate. He calls her a saint – a holy person and a woman who served the Church through the office of deacon. Among my favorite prayers in our tradition is the lovely Prayer of St. Chrysostom, copied here:

Almighty God, you have given us grace at this time with one accord to make our common supplication to you; and you have promised through your well-beloved Son that when two or three are gathered together in his Name you will be in the midst of them: Fulfill now, O Lord, our desires and petitions as may be best for us; granting us in this world knowledge of your truth, and in the age to come life everlasting. Amen.

Of course, in our own Episcopal tradition we began ordaining women only in 1974 in Philadelphia, and we will have a chance to learn more about this later in the fall, thanks to our wonderful Adult Education team:

https://www.episcopalchurch.org/glossary/philadelphia-eleven-the

But as we know, women were indeed called to serve in the early Church, as is seen in the example of Hildegard and Phoebe. There are many women in addition to these two who are recognized by the Church for their various ministries – St. Poplia (fourth century), St. Sophia, known as the “second Phoebe” (fifth century), St. Tabitha, mentioned in the early Acts of the Apostles, also known for her almsgiving, St. Mary, St. Mark’s mother who opened her house for Christian meetings in Jerusalem, St. Lydia, who showed her hospitality to St. Paul and his companions, and St. Priscilla, who was involved in missionary work (FitzGerald 1998). Female deacons are mentioned in the salutations of the epistle to the Philippians (1:1), and the first epistle to Timothy (3:8-12). Many of these women were of course women of color. As the theologian bell hooks has written:

“When we dare to speak in a liberatory voice, we threaten even those who may initially claim to want our words. In the act of overcoming our fear of speech, of being seen as threatening, in the process of learning to speak as subjects, we participate in the global struggle to end domination. When we end our silence, when we speak in a liberated voice, our words connect us with anyone, anywhere who lives in silence. Feminist focus on women finding a voice, on the silence of black women, of women of color, has led to increased interest in our words. This is an important historical moment. We are both speaking of our own volition, out of our commitment to justice, to revolutionary struggle to end domination, and simultaneously called to speak, “invited” to share our words. It is important that we speak. What we speak about is more important. It is our responsibility collectively and individually to distinguish between mere speaking that is about self-aggrandizement, exploitation of the exotic “other,” and that coming to voice which is a gesture of resistance, an affirmation of struggle.”

I am so very grateful for women’s voices and their influence on my journey, including family, friends, professors, and colleagues. My beloved maternal grandmother wisely reminded me that while she was so proud of me for being a “helper,” she also wanted me to remember that “helpfulness is sometimes the sunny side of control.” She well knew that men could often sacrifice relationships for the need to be in control of narratives that were not necessarily their own. I am grateful for my life partner Vicky, who has never stopped learning and growing, with a delightful, incisive intellect, and profound wisdom born of empathy and compassion, and who has so often been courageous in the face of a male dominated healthcare field. Being as I am the father of two sons, I am now so very grateful for two wise and courageous daughters-in-law, giving so much to the communities they serve. And, I am thankful for and delighted by our two granddaughters, Sophia and Alice, whose wisdom, humor, curiosity and compassionate hearts delight us and give us hope for the future. I am reminded of a remarkable book by Carol Gilligan I first encountered at Vanderbilt, “In a Different Voice: Psychological Theory and Women’s Development” where she writes;

“Our ability to communicate our own feelings, and to pick up the feelings of others and thus to heal fractures in connection, threatens the structures of hierarchy. Feelings of empathy and tender compassion for another’s suffering or humanity make it difficult to maintain or justify inequality.”

Indeed, and since the beginning of the Church, women have been using their talents and gifts from God to serve. Of course, we at Holy Family have been blessed for many years by the gifts and graces of the women in our parish, who nurture, sustain, and guide us in so many ways, including our own beloved Deacon Katharine. Thank you, to each of you! I’ll catch you later on down the trail, and I hope to see you in church! Bill+

August 28, 2024

They need not go away; you give them something to eat.”Matthew 14:17

Some time ago, while backpacking in the Four Corners area of Utah, at Cedar Mesa, I awoke in the middle of the night to the sound of a small animal scurrying around outside my tent. At least, I hoped it was small. Earlier in the evening we heard coyotes calling in the deep canyons of Grand Gulch, where we were now four days into our trip. Curious, I unzipped the door of the tent and crawled outside, headlamp shining in the darkness, to find a fox scurrying away. Standing outside the tent, I turned off the headlamp, and looked up. In that moment, I saw more stars than I had ever seen. There was a fullness, depth, color, and abundance to this heavenly host that left me speechless. I will never forget it. The light from those stars had been traveling thousands of years to reach us in Red Canyon that night. Indeed, at that moment we were in the ancestral home of the Anasazi—from which the Puebloan tribes arose—and it occurred to me that the light from some of those stars began its journey at the same time the Anasazi lived in Grand Gulch, some two thousand years ago. In that moment, time and space seemed a seamless web of light. The light seemed to be everywhere, past, present, and future.

John Polkinghorne, the Anglican priest and physicist, has likened the dual nature of Jesus—both human and divine—to the dual nature of light, which we now know is both particle and wave. It is this Incarnational understanding of Christ into which we live in the long, green season of Pentecost, and the abundance we find in the feeding of the 5,000, among our Gospel texts recently, is no exception. When the great crowds pressed in upon them and Jesus was seeking some time alone—they urged him to “send the crowds away.” Jesus’ response is a call to compassion—a summons to them to “suffer with” (“com-passio”) and take action to do justice (Hesed) to that suffering. It is a clear message to the disciples to see the situation differently: “They need not go away; you give them something to eat.”

Most of us probably grew up hearing this story as “Jesus Feeds Five Thousand.” In truth, Jesus fed the disciples, who then fed the multitude. Perhaps this is a call to us to go and do likewise. It may be that the disciples were reticent to feed the crowd because they believed that what they had was simply not enough—indeed, they described it as “nothing.” But in the hands of the living Christ, even our limitations become God’s bountiful abundance. He was not simply asking the disciples to change their offering of bread and fish into something more abundant. He was asking them to think—to imagine—more abundantly! He was asking them to change their ideas about the power of compassion here, now, in this world.

Recently I was in Northern Colorado, working on a book project with dear friends from Vanderbilt Divinity School whom I have known for some 40 years. I’ll be saying more about this in future posts, but among the topics of our book is the importance of relationships that nurture, sustain, and give life-giving meaning to our sojourn on this earth. These dear friends, along with Vicky, our sons and their families, and our community of faith at Holy Family, are gifts helping me to find joy and meaning in even the most challenging moments. While in Colorado I rose early one morning for a trail run and was greeted by a glorious sunrise, a surprisingly abundant gift—a moment in time for which I was deeply grateful.

That night in Utah, the light from the stars, a seamless tapestry of time and space, reminded me of the Eucharist we celebrate together in this sacred place, our beloved Holy Family, and which is seen in the foreshadowing of the Eucharist in the feeding of the five thousand. Our present participation in a past reality, and calling down of the spirit, are both a commemoration of the Last Supper and an anticipation of the heavenly banquet to come. In the meantime, we are called to participate in God’s reconciling compassion right here, and now. Teresa of Avila said “Christ has no body now on earth but yours, no hands but yours, no feet but yours; yours are the eyes through which Christ’s compassion is to look out to the earth, yours are the feet by which he is to go about doing good, and yours are the hands by which he is to bless us now.” Blessing, breaking, and giving away…we know how to do this, because we do this together all the time. Look up. Look around. The loaves and fishes spread, like light from distant stars, on that hillside long ago. Let us go and do likewise. I’ll catch you later on down the trail, and I hope to see you in church!

Blessings, Bill+

September 8, 2024

16th Sunday after Pentecost – Bill Harkins

Proper 18, Year B

The Collect of the Day Grant us, O Lord, to trust in you with all our hearts; for, as you always resist the proud who confide in their own strength, so you never forsake those who make their boast of your mercy; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.  

The Gospel: Mark 7:24-37 Jesus set out and went away to the region of Tyre. He entered a house and did not want anyone to know he was there. Yet he could not escape notice, but a woman whose little daughter had an unclean spirit immediately heard about him, and she came and bowed down at his feet. Now the woman was a Gentile, of Syrophoenician origin. She begged him to cast the demon out of her daughter. He said to her, “Let the children be fed first, for it is not fair to take the children’s food and throw it to the dogs.” But she answered him, “Sir, even the dogs under the table eat the children’s crumbs.” Then he said to her, “For saying that, you may go—the demon has left your daughter.” So she went home, found the child lying on the bed, and the demon gone…    

Dear Sister in Christ:  

It must seem strange to be getting a letter some 2000 years after your courageous encounter with Jesus of Nazareth. I write to you out of deep admiration for your story. I confess that I am also writing because this is what I tell others to do when they are confused about how they feel, or in need of clarity about a way forward in the midst of a messy, uncomfortable situation. The story of your effort to get help for your daughter that day is still told by many, and it may please you to know that it is written in a book called the Holy Bible—and in a chapter in that book called the Gospel of Mark. I had not read your story in quite a while, and for some reason, this time as I read, it made me sad, and uncomfortable. I should probably mention that I am a teacher, and a priest—though not the kind of priest you would have been familiar with—and a counselor. So part of my discomfort comes from feeling that I should know just the right thing to say, or feel, or think to explain away my discomfort. Yet, I do not. In reading your story again I was struck not only by how uncomfortable it made me, but how much I admired you, and how many questions I had about your encounter with Jesus. In fact, I had so many different feelings and questions that I found myself not wanting to think about your story at all. This made me even more uncomfortable, but it also made me curious. You see this, too, is part of my training—to be willing to ask tough questions in relation to things that make us want to look the other way, things we would rather ignore, or deny, and pretend will go away if we do so. I imagined different ways of understanding and “interpreting” your encounter with Jesus so that this might take away my discomfort. Yet, I could not. And, come to that, I wonder if perhaps we are called by the Gospel to feel uncomfortable at times. So, the only way to proceed seemed to be that of being as transparent as possible, and let your story stand on its own, even if it meant being scared, and angry, and uncertain, and even if it meant that those with whom I share this had some of these feelings as well… so, I decided to write you a letter. I should also confess that I am a person of privilege in my country. Unlike you I do not really know what it is like to be overlooked because of race, or gender, or skin color. I have not known real hunger—and I have never had to wonder where my next meal was coming from. I have not been passed over for a job because of the color of my skin, or because of my gender. I have not been discriminated against or overlooked in spite of the content of my character—and yet I imagine this was a way of life for you. In fact, it occurs to me as I write to you that although I have told you my name, I do not even know yours. You are often referred to as “a Canaanite woman,” or “a certain woman.” In what we call Mark’s Gospel—another version of your story—you are referred to as the “Syro-Phoenician woman.” In my country, if you have to say you are African American or Native American or Latino American, you already know you are often more subject to being overlooked, on the margins, ignored. I suspect you knew this feeling quite well. I don’t ever recall feeling the need to refer to myself as White American, or Euro American. In Matthew’s version of your story, in which you are referred to as “a Canaanite woman,” this meant that you were marginalized in the world of Judaism—both as a Canaanite and as a woman. You would have been considered the property of your husband or your father. And in spite of this—in spite of the fact that race, gender, class, and nationalism were all working against you, you approached a group of men—also taboo, and you kept doing so; and why? Perhaps you were a single mother—why else would you have made the journey on your own—why would your husband or some other male advocate not speak for you as custom demanded? And being a single mother, your position would have been even more tenuous—with virtually no status or material resources. It must have been embarrassing and uncomfortable for everyone concerned, including you, and clearly the disciples in the story are aggravated by your persistence—in Matthews version of your story, they even warned Jesus to ignore you—“Send her away,” they said, “for she keeps shouting after us.” They turned their backs on you, and yet you persisted. We are different in all these and so many more ways, you and I, but I do know what it is like to be a parent—I am the father of two sons. That part of your story got my attention as well. I know what t it is like to sit up all night with a sick child, and to huddle in a hospital emergency room scared, and desperate for the healing of a child. I know what it is like to suffer with and for my children. I also understand why you approached Jesus and why you sought him out in your time of need. You did this for the very same reason that so many over the past 2000 years have done so—for healing, for strength, for sustenance, for release from the powers of darkness, and for wholeness of mind, body, and spirit—for community….for embrace—rather than exclusion. In fact it is for these reasons that we gather this morning, in my community of worship, and it is for this reason I am sharing my letter with those whom I serve. No doubt you heard of Jesus by word of mouth. Again and again he was moved by compassion to take action, do justice, work miracles. Surely this is what you heard, too. You expected compassion, and justice, and kindness. And not for you, but for your daughter who was suffering. So, against all odds and all that was working against you, you persisted. Even as I admire and respect you, I am troubled by Jesus’ behavior. “Have mercy on me O Lord, son of David,” you cried, and he tried to ignore you altogether, and yet you persisted. I wonder how he could ignore you and then dismiss you? There is no way to clean up this story, no way to sanitize it or explain it away. I’ve heard some very learned people try to do so, and it cannot be done, it always has a hollow sound. And your willingness to be vulnerable allows me to see and hear what I too would rather ignore. “I have come only for the lost sheep of Israel,” Jesus finally said—I am here to help only those who are like me. Still you persisted, kneeling before him, and in what is at one and the same time incredible humility and vulnerability, and remarkable courage, you say “Lord, help me.” And then, this unbelievable statement from our Christ—“It is not fair to take the children’s food and throw it to the dogs.” For a brief moment you were turned away, and my heart sinks. Just as those with whom I am sharing this letter feel in coming to church, you expected the experience of the sacred grace of God in coming to Jesus. Just as we feel wounded or hurt if we are dismissed and overlooked by brothers and sisters in Christ, you would have by all rights felt crushed, devastated, defeated. How could Jesus compare anyone to a dog? How could he say, in effect, some don’t belong at the table, or even beneath it—some don’t deserve the bread—some are outside the circle of care and compassion—his love is only for those within the circle? How could he do this when so often he told us that all are welcome at the table? And still you persisted. Kneeling before him, even more vulnerable, you spoke up and said to him in a remarkably witty and articulate response—“Yet even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from the master’s table.” You should know if you do not already, that many have followed in your footsteps. Your courage and determination echo down through the halls of history for all women and men whose opportunities were denied by virtue of gender, race, or social status.  A woman named Sojourner Truth, born a slave, once said “That man there, he says women can’t have as much rights as men, because Christ wasn’t a woman. Where did Christ come from? From God and a woman…and ain’t I a Woman? I have born 13 children and seen most all sold into slavery, and when I cried out none but Jesus heard me.” Others followed—women such as Rosa Parks, and Ruby Bridges, and so many other “certain women” who took up your cause. And finally, blessedly, Jesus heard you. He came to himself and in so doing extended his ministry beyond the Jews to include us all. He had behaved as he had because he could—because in his culture he had power and status and it pains me to think how often I have unthinkingly done the same. But at last he exclaimed “Woman, great is your faith. Let it be done as you desire.” And your daughter was healed as you must have known she would be. Do you know that I cannot recall another place in the Gospels where someone won a theological argument with Jesus? Do you know that you were the bearer of Good News to the One who gave Good News to us? In that instant his soul was enlarged, his compassion deepened, the love at the center of His message bloomed ever brighter. By his willingness to learn, to change his mind, He taught us that we are here to grow, to learn, and to be open to the grace-filled movement of the Holy Spirit in our lives. You, with humility and confidence, deference and boldness, and a deep abiding belief that God’s love will transcend the obstacles that would keep us in bondage—taught him, and by extension all of us. Well, it is almost time for me to close this letter. In the church I serve, the center of all that we do is called the Eucharist. We gather at the table and celebrate with bread and wine what you helped me see in a new way through your story. We come to that table, each of us, as God’s children, with an advocate in Christ Jesus much as you advocated for your daughter. And we receive the bread from the top of the table, not the crumbs from beneath. In so doing we, like you, receive the gift of grace, of God’s love—an ever present reminder that we are not excluded by God… no, not one of us, by virtue of gender, or race, or sexual orientation, or political affiliation or any other boundary that would alienate, divide, or separate us from the love of God. I give thanks in gratitude that in your story, I now see more clearly that this is a good practice in relation to all that we do: especially all that we do in the service of doing justice, loving kindness, walking humbly with our God—and respecting the dignity of every human being. Thank you.   Your brother in Christ, Bill

September 1, 2024

15th Sunday adter Pentecost – Bill Harkins

Proper 17, Year B

The Collect of the Day

Lord of all power and might, the author and giver of all good things: Graft in our hearts the love of your Name; increase in us true religion; nourish us with all goodness; and bring forth in us the fruit of good works; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God for ever and ever.Amen.

The Gospel: Mark 7:1-8, 14-15, 21-23

When the Pharisees and some of the scribes who had come from Jerusalem gathered around him, they noticed that some of his disciples were eating with defiled hands, that is, without washing them. (For the Pharisees, and all the Jews, do not eat unless they thoroughly wash their hands, thus observing the tradition of the elders; and they do not eat anything from the market unless they wash it; and there are also many other traditions that they observe, the washing of cups, pots, and bronze kettles.) So the Pharisees and the scribes asked him, “Why do your disciples not live according to the tradition of the elders, but eat with defiled hands?” He said to them, “Isaiah prophesied rightly about you hypocrites, as it is written, ‘This people honors me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me; in vain do they worship me, teaching human precepts as doctrines.’ You abandon the commandment of God and hold to human tradition.” Then he called the crowd again and said to them, “Listen to me, all of you, and understand: there is nothing outside a person that by going in can defile, but the things that come out are what defile.” For it is from within, from the human heart, that evil intentions come: fornication, theft, murder, adultery, avarice, wickedness, deceit, licentiousness, envy, slander, pride, folly. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person.”

In the Name of the God of Creation who loves us all…Amen. Good morning, and welcome to Holy Family on this fifteenth Sunday after Pentecost. We are so glad you have chosen to spend part of your Labor Day weekend with us, and if you are visiting today, we hope you have found or will find a home among us! Welcome, grace, and peace to each of you this day!

In the Gospel appointed for today, we have a dialogue that may on the surface seem alien to us, with its surface theme of physical holiness and its connection to our religious practices. In one sense this is like being invited into a family squabble and it can be tempting to excuse oneself and quietly exit. To do so would be to miss the deeper message here, however—a message about choosing and living out what it means to be in right relationship, respecting the dignity of every human being, and treating others with kindness and respect. And this starts with taking a look at oneself, being mindful of our own, sometimes egotistical desires, and keeping the welfare of the common good in focus, and as the ultimate goal of our core values.

Lately, thanks to my dear friend and colleague Martha Sterne, I’ve been re-reading Eudora Welty’s wonderful book “The Optimist’s Daughter.”  Maybe you remember the story. It is the memoir of Laurel McKelva Hand, a woman in her mid-forties, trying to come to terms with the deaths of all those she has most loved in life: her mother, her father, and her husband Phil, who was killed in World War II. At one point in the novel, Laurel remembers a train ride she took with her then fiancé Phil, from Chicago, Illinois to Mount Salus, Mississippi, where they were to be married. Miss Welty writes:

When they were climbing the long approach to a bridge after leaving Cairo, rising slowly higher until they rode above the tops of bare trees, she looked down and saw the pale light widening and the river bottoms opening out, and then the water appearing, reflecting the low, early sun. There were two rivers. Here was where they came together. This was the confluence of the waters, the Ohio and the Mississippi…All they could see was sky, water, birds, light, and confluence. It was the whole morning world….And they themselves were part of the confluence. Their own joint act of faith had brought them here at the very moment and matched its occurrence, and proceeded as it proceeded. Direction itself was made beautiful, momentous. They were riding as one with it, right up front. It’s our turn! she’d thought exultantly. And we’re going to live forever…Left …of a death made of water and fire in a year long gone, Phil could tell her of her life. For her life, any life, she had to believe, was nothing but the continuity of its love.

Oh, my. Such lovely writing, and in the last line I quoted, about how any life is “nothing but the continuity of its love,” there is a deep and abiding connection to the Gospel for today. And I find myself drawn to that one word Miss Welty used repeatedly, “confluence,” a noun meaning “a flowing together of two or more streams; the point of juncture of such streams; the combined stream formed by this juncture; a tributary.” Confluence is not a religious word; you won’t find it anywhere in the Bible. Nevertheless, the stories of our faith are filled with moments of confluence – the place or point in time in which God and human beings come together. In the text for today that confluence was a call to search our hearts, and to mindfully breathe new life in to our practices and disciplines so they sustain and nurture those things that lead to life-giving results.

I believe Jesus is calling us in this text to lives of integrity—the Latin root is “integritas,” and my favorite interpretation of this is “wholeness.” After all, we get similar words such as “integers,” or whole numbers, and “integration,” to bring together into whole cloth, from this same Latin root. In responding as he does to the Pharisees—and in referring as he does to the heart, thought to be the center of one’s capacity for courage and compassion—Jesus is asking us to consider the heart of our own faith and tradition, and the practices and disciplines that sustain it in wholeness.   Begging the question, what activities, ritual and otherwise, help us be in right relationship with our neighbors, practicing hospitality, and grace? What allows us to maintain and deepen what theologian Paul Tillich referred to as “self-integration,” that process of finding our center of spiritual health and moral integrity? For Tillich this corresponded to a therapeutic model familiar to pastoral counselors…that one’s spiritual health is the wholeness of a person’s center, the “ground of one’s being” as Tillich called it. In this sense, Jesus may be asking us to pay attention not so much to what we eat, or to Levitical laws, but rather to ask what may be eating us. This is why Jesus says, “All these evil things come from within.” The Family Therapist and Rabbi Edwin Friedman once said; “grief that is not transformed gets transmitted.” So often, as a clinician, I see the effects of swallowing grief, or anger, or fear, rather than transforming them into life-giving possibilities. When we do this, our anger and grief, pushed down, inevitably come out in ways hurtful to others, and to ourselves. And come to that, how might we understand in a new way that when we celebrate the Eucharist—as we will in just a moment—we do so sharing in time and space that first Eucharist, and this one here and now, and all those to come, as if time is in those moments is standing still, which in fact it is doing. And in that moment, we are invited to leave at the altar those things which might keep us in bondage, and embrace the wholeness of our common humanity in Christ. I hear Jesus’ familiar and comforting words, I have called you friends…yes once again, but I am not the same person who heard them before. As Nobel Laureate and poet Czeslaw Milosz says

Love means to learn to look at yourself

The way one looks at distant things

For you are only one thing among many.

And whoever sees that way heals his heart,

Without knowing it, from various ills—

A bird and a tree say to him: Friend.

Then he wants to use himself and things

So that they stand in the glow of ripeness.

It doesn’t matter whether he knows what he serves:

Who serves best doesn’t always understand.

Now, I don’t know exactly what Milosz means by “standing the glow of ripeness” but I very much like this phrase. It speaks to a theology of abundance rather than scarcity. It means being patient with one another and erring on the side of grace and curiosity rather than criticism and judgment. This is the journey of the Paschal mystery, and the hope of the strength, courage, and resilience to abide with one another in love. It’s what gives us space to celebrate the Eucharist at this table, and to wish our Jewish brothers and sister a blessed Rosh Hashanah next month, and to endeavor to pray for both our Jewish and Palestinian sisters and brothers, and those in Sudan, because when we heal our heart as Milosz suggests, and we give ourselves away in love, we are not trapped in dualistic, binary ways of being in the world. Rather than either/or, it’s both/and. Rather than a theology of scarcity, we practice abundance, an abundance on full display in the passage from the Song of Solomon we heard read so well just now. Let’s promise not to let our religious practices and convictions become so entrenched and mundane that we have forgotten the deeper, life-giving meaning to which they point. Let’s remember to err on the side of love, and even if we have firm beliefs about what it means to be church, let’s remember in this season of transition to show up, pay attention, speak the truth in love with grace, and let go of attachment to agendas and outcomes we cannot control. Let’s be kind to one another, especially while we are in this liminal time of transition as a parish—as we know that times of change are often rife with criticism and judgment borne of anxiety and old narratives, wounds, and unfinished business. We will be fine as long as we work together with grace, and understanding, and patience. Those things that most irritate us about others are often opportunities to learn more about ourselves, and where we have what Carl Jung called “shadow work” to do. As Jesus says, the things that come out—often when we least expect it—“are the things that defile.” There is a lovely African American spiritual, the words of which go something like this: Deep River, My home is over Jordan. Deep river, Lord. I want to cross over into campground. Campground is that home where we make choices that lead to the confluences of the continuity of love, to use Eudora Welty’s lovely language, and choices give us agency. It is, like the Eucharist, a moveable feast. There, we seek to live lives of integrity, and be faithful to our Baptismal Covenant to respect the dignity of every human being, and in so doing mindfully reflect God’s loving intentions for all of humanity. It is that place from which we extend compassion, and thereby open ourselves to deeper understandings of who we are in relationship to God, self and other.Together, my sisters and brothers, we can do this with courage—with heart—and without building walls that would keep out those who are different from ourselves. After all, any life is nothing but the continuity of its love. And we can love completely without complete understanding. We can place more importance on being in relationship, with love, than on being right. On this Eudora Welty, and Jesus, agree. Amen.

August 25, 2024

14th Sunday after PentecostTed Hackett

John 6:51-58

It’s nice to be back up here …

As many of you know I have been pretty much out of circulation for a few months…

As we age we become like old cars…

The parts wear out…

Some they can replace…

Some they can fix for a while…

And some just…

have to give out!

I won’t waste your time with details…

Corner me privately if you want and I’ll bore you with my ailments

But to the matter at hand…

the Gospel readings…

The last two Sundays…and today…Our Gospel readings are from the 6th chapter of John…

They are really quite mystifying if you read them closely…

  Now that’s partly because these readings, are from three different sources…

John had at least three different traditions to deal with…

All of them dealing with the Eucharist…

Three different Churches…

Probably all in the region of Ephesus in what is now Turkey…

There were probably several Christian communities around Ephesus…it was a pretty big city…

And each may have had slightly different traditions by the year 95 when this Gospel was written…

John wrote this Gospel in part to unite these communities…to keep them from arguing…

So when you read John’s Gospel…

It often seems disjointed and perhaps even self-contradictory, because it is put together with pieces from each tradition…

Now in today’s readings…it is clear that John is trying to clarify something about what each of these Churches do every Sunday….the Holy Eucharist…but about which they have disagreements..

Disagreements about just what the Eucharist is and how the Eucharist brings Jesus…

The real Jesus…

Brings Jesus to us! 

And how does John believe this happens?

Remember…John is trying to justify several traditions…….

For instance, last week’s Gospel has Jesus saying: “I am the bread of life. Who ever comes to me will never be hungry and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.”

It’s very easy to read this metaphorically.

It’s very easy to think that Jesus is just saying that hunger and thirst are metaphors for spiritual things…

Even so, the Pharisees in the audience are offended.

They know Jesus is the son of Mary and Joseph and as far as they are concerned he did not come down from heaven!

This is typical of John’s Gospel…

Jesus says something profound and his listeners…take him to be speaking literally and just don’t get it!

And what Jesus says two weeks ago sounds like a metaphor.

But… a bit later on in the same Chapter 6… the Gospel from last week, we find something quite different…

Jesus’ words are far less rhetorical.

Listen again…

Jesus says:

“I am the living bread that came down from Heaven. Whoever eats of this bread will live forever; and the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh” … “Very truly I tell you unless you eat the flesh of the Son of man and drink his blood you have no life in you! Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day; for my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink. Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood abide in me and I in them. … Whoever eats me will live because of me.

Now…that is pretty graphic stuff!

And it sounds very much like primitive, barbarian ideas…

The sort of things cannibals believe…

Eat the body of a dead man and magically gain his power…

It’s no wonder the Pharisees did not “get it”…“How can this man give us his flesh to eat?”

A very reasonable question!

As a matter of fact…it is precisely one of things the Church has been arguing about for about 2,000 years. ….

“How can this man give us his flesh to eat?”

We don’t have time to explore the ins and outs of this question of how this could happen….

Just believe me, that for 2,000 years…

Christians have argued with each other…

Have excommunicated each other…

Have executed each other…

Have even fought wars over this question…

Theologians have yelled at each other…

Have written volumes trying to reconcile the issue of Christ’s Presence in the Eucharist with logic…or Science…or for that matter…

             Common Sense!….

Thomas Aquinas gave us an elegant, learned theory…which is almost always misunderstood…

Goes by the name “Transubstantiation”…

But it has a fatal flaw…

If anyone wants to talk about that…again…corner me and we’ll talk about substance and accidents.

The great Reformer…father of most Protestant thinking about the Eucharist, Ulrich Zwingli…

Said it was a matter of what you believed…             

If you believed Christ was present that was as good as his really being there…

Martin Luther insisted that Jesus wasn’t lying when He said: “This is my body…” and we just have to take it on faith…

And Anglicanism…that is our tradition…

Has said: “We strongly profess all theories….but the important thing is to do it….”….and then grow into understanding.

To celebrate it and to be open to what   God would have us believe… 

And that is pretty much what we do…..

And that is worth exploring…..

Let’s look at a sort of “case history”…

Let’s say a young woman “falls in love”                            

Or we could say she is infatuated…

Her perception of him is dazzling!

But….she doesn’t know him very well.

Courtship…to use an old-fashioned word…

Is a process of really knowing a person better And she does find out things about him…

Some she is not fond of…..

He is always late…stuff like that…

But basically…she likes what she discovers…

And infatuation…almost without her noticing …

Deepens…

and turns to love.

Of course…this is ideal…Happily ever after…

But life is life…

And after a while…she finds things are not always peaches and cream…

It isn’t that he is abusive or unfaithful

But….he doesn’t always anticipate her needs…and fulfill them. He forgets their anniversary!

Sometimes he is distracted…

and doesn’t attend to her.

Sometimes…

When she wants something…                 

He says: “No,

We can’t afford it!”

It doesn’t seem like a perfect relationship anymore.

She begins to have fantasies of finding someone else who could fulfill all her wishes…

But then…One day when she is feeling pretty down…

She starts to cry…

And she realizes that he is there…beside her…

And the whole time she has been feeling lonely…

He has been right there…

She just wasn’t open to knowing it…

Maybe she was too self-occupied…

Maybe she was still in the fantasy-land of first love….quite adolescent!

But now…somehow…in her need…

He is there…

And she knows…

He loves her.

And that is how it is for many people I have known…..

For many it is the story of coming to know Our Lord is there for us …

Especially in the holy Eucharist…

First… when we go to Communion it seems like a really nice piece of Symbolism…

We may find it comforting…even a bit fascinating….but not life-changing.

But then…if we keep on…maybe…

Maybe things deepen…and we begin to…somehow…know…that he is really, somehow…in that bread and wine….

It can be a strange feeling…

A little scary…

But amazing.

But it doesn’t last…

It can be fleeting…

It cannot be summoned at will…

It can seem like it was an illusion…

But then…maybe in a time of fear or sadness…we find out that our sense of Jesus’ presence in the Eucharist is real…

He is with us…

He is with us…even when we don’t know it…

When we don’t feel it.

And he is with us…

In the Eucharist

It’s O.K. if all this doesn’t happen to you…

God doesn’t judge you for it…you are no less a Christian…

This sort of thing is, after all, a gift from God…

We have to cooperate….but it is a gift.

But it is worth waiting for…

And like any coming of Jesus,

Without seeming to change anything… It changes everything.